=By Ian Hay=
A KNIGHT ON WHEELS.
HAPPY-GO-LUCKY. Illustrated by Charles E. Brock.
A SAFETY MATCH. With frontispiece.
A MAN'S MAN. With frontispiece.
THE RIGHT STUFF. With frontispiece.
HOUGHTON MIFFLIN COMPANY BOSTON AND NEW YORK
A KNIGHT ON WHEELS
A KNIGHT ON WHEELS
BY IAN HAY
[Illustration]
BOSTON AND NEW YORK HOUGHTON MIFFLIN COMPANY =The Riverside Press Cambridge= 1914
COPYRIGHT, 1914, BY IAN HAY BEITH
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
_Published September 1914_
TO H. M. S.
CONTENTS
BOOK ONE
THE MISOGYNISTS
I. ENVIRONMENT 3
II. LE PREMIER PAS 19
III. SAMSON AND DELILAH 31
IV. HEREDITY 46
V. MISTAKEN IDENTITY 59
VI. RENOVARE DOLOREM 66
VII. THE INCONSISTENCY OF UNCLE JOSEPH 78
VIII. THE HAMPSTEAD HEATH CONSPIRACY 90
IX. GENUS IRRITABILE 100
X. THE ECCENTRIC GENTLEMAN 109
XI. RED GABLES 129
XII. THE OFFICIAL DEMISE OF TOMMY SMITH 133
BOOK TWO
_LABOR OMNIA VINCIT_
XIII. THE GOLDEN AGE 141
XIV. THE IRON AGE 174
XV. OMEGA, CERTAINLY NOT 182
Table of contents (by pages)
- 1: A Knight on Wheels by Ian Hay
- 2: From the dictation of Uncle Joseph
- 3: Some enclosed lengthy screeds but no cheques
- 4: Uncle Joseph would nod his head
- 5: Observed James Nimmo admiringly
- 6: Enquired James Nimmo dubiously
- 7: There are so many Smiths Quite so
- 8: 2 Appeal on behalf of a retired garotter
- 9: I set my mark against the name of Lemuel Bloote
- 10: Cooked and served by James Nimmo
- 11: Philip still played in the nursery
- 12: While James Nimmo enriched his vocabulary
- 13: James Nimmo could quote whole stanzas of him
- 14: In the Edgeware Road this time
- 15: Once more Philip stood before her
- 16: Philip began to climb the gate
- 17: Marguerite Evelyn Leslie Falconer
- 18: They are a parry parry parry sitic growth
- 19: Late Fellow of Trinity College
- 20: Entirely without private means
- 21: I shall not send the revised list
- 22: Philip felt positive of one thing
- 23: But James Nimmo persisted in doing it himself
- 24: He thinks they are an incu incu something
- 25: He called the other ones 'wolf scarers
- 26: He only paints wolf scarers now
- 27: Philip enquired awkwardly I say
- 28: But the Searchlight was above suspicion
- 29: Turner found it quite impossible to read the addresses
- 30: Ten minutes later Uncle Joseph was shaking hands with Dill
- 31: Uncle Joseph had turned his back
- 32: All my time had been lavished on the regiment
- 33: That I had been neglecting the regiment of late
- 34: Regimental routine wearied me to death
- 35: Uncle Joseph turned to his nephew
- 36: He turned up Merlin and Vivien
- 37: Admitted Philip apprehensively
- 38: Lady Broadhurst was speaking again
- 39: Philip shook his head apologetically
- 40: Lady Broadhurst was on her feet
- 41: Philip looked into the library
- 42: Philip accepted the invitation with alacrity
- 43: Philip was conscious of a sudden thrill
- 44: Explained Philip enthusiastically
- 45: Half finished canvasses prospective wolf scarers
- 46: Miss Falconer was in a somewhat dishevelled condition
- 47: She wore a short and rather ragged frock
- 48: The downtrodden breadwinner proceeded to the studio
- 49: The cretin pointed out gently
- 50: Falconer uttered a yell of triumph
- 51: He would arrange details when he reached Coventry
- 52: Punctuated by the clink of a spanner
- 53: Mablethorpe put her hand to her head
- 54: Mablethorpe eyed the pedestrian curiously
- 55: Boanerges knows you you don't know Boanerges
- 56: Mablethorpe surveyed him admiringly
- 57: Mablethorpe might not be interested in Uncle Joseph
- 58: He never allows a woman into his house
- 59: Mablethorpe rather than himself
- 60: Mablethorpe of his ruined child
- 61: Departed upon Boanerges to seek out Uncle Joseph
- 62: Mablethorpe the rest of the story
- 63: That my books are read by other people besides schoolgirls
- 64: Mablethorpe with childish satisfaction
- 65: Mablethorpe laid down the letter
- 66: Mablethorpe said His best book
- 67: Then a lusty fag rising sixteen
- 68: There were cricket leagues and cricket cups innumerable
- 69: He met his Housemaster but seldom
- 70: But the Quartette would have none of them
- 71: Where housemasters and form masters were intermingled
- 72: Brett stiffly expressed regret
- 73: Who knew that Allnutt was a good man at bottom
- 74: Allnutt would lead him a heart
- 75: And of scoring off Allnutt for all time
- 76: Brett was for telephoning for four cabs on the spot
- 77: The Quartette turned dismally towards the door
- 78: Came the Meldrum Automatic Electro magnetic Brake
- 79: Mablethorpe grew more tearful than ever
- 80: Remarked Miss Mablethorpe brightly
- 81: Mablethorpe I was asking for her
- 82: Mablethorpe with great precision
- 83: Mablethorpe turned to his daughter
- 84: My son a specialist in Things
- 85: Mablethorpe nodded his head gravely
- 86: Murgatroyd was not to be caught
- 87: You may sell automobiles for a living and remain a gentleman
- 88: Upon his mantelpiece was a model of the Meldrum Carburettor
- 89: Atherton was not so easy to eject
- 90: This was in the pre Willesden Green days
- 91: Presently Miss Jennings appeared
- 92: Proceeded Miss Jennings maternally
- 93: Atherton he had deprived this plucky
- 94: For Miss Jennings turned to Philip
- 95: Rendle Timothy was not of a far reaching nature
- 96: Timothy turned to him in simple wonder
- 97: We'll run this little lad down to Brooklands oh
- 98: It provided Master Timothy with some much needed employment
- 99: Observed Miss Jennings swiftly
- 100: And then go down to Coventry and see Bilston again
- 101: Miss Jennings is a Conservative
- 102: Let us go and study the Suffragette in her natural state
- 103: The crowd turned to the heckler
- 104: What do you think of his views on ragtime
- 105: He was frustrated by Lady Rendle
- 106: Miss Duncombe shivered elegantly
- 107: Mentioned Miss Garvey carelessly
- 108: Master Timothy set out to reclaim his long lost friend
- 109: Boanerges had taken the van in the rear
- 110: It is the efficiency of the brakes
- 111: Philip noted that the side brake was full on
- 112: Philip hastily jammed on the side brake
- 113: The Brake itself was in perfect order
- 114: When the housemaid had departed
- 115: How is the semilunar cartilage this morning
- 116: Could know Peggy Falconer without loving her
- 117: Jean Leslie knew something of masculine nature
- 118: Having placed herself in an absolutely impregnable position
- 119: Continued Miss Leslie scathingly
- 120: That was the Meldrum Carburettor
- 121: Knightsbridge is a long way from Oxford Street
- 122: But Philip was already doing penance
- 123: Timothy was at the bottom of the trouble
- 124: Timothy gave a perplexed smile
- 125: He said affectionately to Miss Leslie
- 126: Grice became greatly flustered
- 127: Grice was understood to mumble assent
- 128: And it puzzled Peggy more than a little
- 129: Now Peggy bent her brows judicially
- 130: Philip descended from the clouds abruptly
- 131: Suddenly the querulous Montagu blazed up
- 132: Without Peggy or prospective Peggy the day's work
- 133: In the spring Dumps is to come out not of gaol
- 134: Jean Leslie painted miniatures of them
- 135: During this narrative Peggy sat silent and preoccupied
- 136: Jean Leslie nodded her head slowly and comprehendingly
- 137: Jean Leslie sat long over the teacups
- 138: Montagu surveyed her critically
- 139: Miss Leslie laughed appreciatively
- 140: Miss Leslie nodded sympathetically
- 141: Montagu Falconer positively shuddered
- 142: Montagu consigned Adolphus to perdition
- 143: That we are engaged to dine to night with Derek Rayner
- 144: Mablethorpe to regard one another curiously
- 145: With a gardenia in his buttonhole
- 146: If Arfur Mow reelly 'asn't arrived
- 147: Derek Rayner was in the seventh heaven
- 148: Have debated this problem in their time
- 149: Where Mexican Steve had just finished pulling over the lever
- 150: Headed by the Sheriff and Miss Maimie Matterson
- 151: Mablethorpe to the company in general
- 152: Philip took stock of his surroundings
- 153: Rendle pretty well own the earth between them
- 154: Rendle told me he was very sorry for her
- 155: How does the Bosphorus compare with Oxford Street
- 156: And enquire into your private affairs
- 157: Brand's gloomy eyes turned upon Philip suspiciously
- 158: He was most gentlemanly about it
- 159: Confessed Miss Jennings frankly
- 160: Explained the experienced Miss Jennings
- 161: Echoed Miss Jennings wonderingly
- 162: You can put it on board the Caspian
- 163: Grice got them out of the cupboard as soon as I returned
- 164: Timothy surveyed his friend critically
- 165: Continued the chastened Timothy
- 166: Grice glided respectfully into the room
- 167: Grice's is a motto out of a cracker
- 168: The Epistle of Theophilus lay on the table before its author
- 169: Miss Falconer wore the neatest little white satin shoes
- 170: Coming to a halt before the mantelpiece
- 171: That these events always occurred in a conservatory
- 172: Replied Peggy with great vigour
- 173: Said Peggy quietly one had almost said listlessly
- 174: Answer adjudged incorrect Open the letter and read it
- 175: And the rapturous convalescence at Tite Street
- 176: Responded the infatuated Timothy
- 177: Exclaimed Timothy in a tragic voice
- 178: Continued Peggy in a tragic voice
- 179: You go and perform a similar service for Babs Duncombe
- 180: Peggy was standing at the top of the staircase
- 181: Romilly Fedden A bride and groom
- 182: Straightforward bit of fiction
- 183: Unbiassed was replaced with unbiased