Produced by Charles Keller and David Widger
A YOUNG GIRL'S DIARY
Prefaced with a Letter by Sigmund Freud
Translated by Eden and Cedar Paul
CONTENTS
FIRST YEAR Age 11 to 12 SECOND YEAR Age 12 to 13 THIRD YEAR Age 13 to 14 LAST HALF-YEAR Age 14 to 14 1/2 CONCLUSION
PREFACE
THE best preface to this journal written by a young girl belonging to the upper middle class is a letter by Sigmund Freud dated April 27, 1915, a letter wherein the distinguished Viennese psychologist testifies to the permanent value of the document:
"This diary is a gem. Never before, I believe, has anything been written enabling us to see so clearly into the soul of a young girl, belonging to our social and cultural stratum, during the years of puberal development. We are shown how the sentiments pass from the simple egoism of childhood to attain maturity; how the relationships to parents and other members of the family first shape themselves, and how they gradually become more serious and more intimate; how friendships are formed and broken. We are shown the dawn of love, feeling out towards its first objects. Above all, we are shown how the mystery of the sexual life first presses itself vaguely on the attention, and then takes entire possession of the growing intelligence, so that the child suffers under the load of secret knowledge but gradually becomes enabled to shoulder the burden. Of all these things we have a description at once so charming, so serious, and so artless, that it cannot fail to be of supreme interest to educationists and psychologists.
"It is certainly incumbent on you to publish the diary. All students of my own writings will be grateful to you."
In preparing these pages for the press, the editor has toned down nothing, has added nothing, and has suppressed nothing. The only alterations she has made have been such as were essential to conceal the identity of the writer and of other persons mentioned in the document. Consequently, surnames, Christian names, and names of places, have been changed. These modifications have enabled the original author of the diary to allow me to place it at the free disposal of serious readers.
No attempt has been made to correct trifling faults in grammar and other inelegancies of style. For the most part, these must not be regarded as the expression of a child's incapacity for the control of language. Rather must they be looked upon as manifestations of affective trends, as errors in functioning brought about by the influence of the Unconscious.
THE EDITOR. VIENNA, _Autumn_, 1919.
FIRST YEAR, AGE ELEVEN TO TWELVE
FIRST YEAR
July 12, 19 . . . Hella and I are writing a diary. We both agreed that when we went to the high school we would write a diary every day. Dora keeps a diary too, but she gets furious if I look at it. I call Helene "Hella," and she calls me "Rita;" Helene and Grete are so vulgar. Dora has taken to calling herself "Thea," but I go on calling her "Dora." She says that little children (she means me and Hella) ought not to keep a diary. She says they will write such a lot of nonsense. No more than in hers and Lizzi's.
Table of contents (by pages)
- 1: A Young Girl's Diary by Anonymous
- 2: In dictation I made only 1 mistake writing ihn without h
- 3: As if the arbour belonged to her
- 4: Fraulein Pruckl has written to me
- 5: But Robert got savage and said Erna is a perfect nuisance
- 6: Robert and I and Liesel and Erna and Rene
- 7: I asked him what name he had tattooed on him
- 8: For Hella and I use upright writing for our diary
- 9: About that castigation business
- 10: Dora is to have a navy blue silk dustcloak
- 11: Inspee says that she had her last year
- 12: Hella says she doesn't know exactly herself
- 13: Had it when I wrote that Inspee wouldn't bathe
- 14: We see a lot of Berta Franke now
- 15: Then Berta Franke nearly burst out laughing
- 16: Did you give Mali that waistband
- 17: Dora says she lives in Phorusgasse
- 18: We are giving everyone of the staff a Krampus
- 19: Then she looked frightfully hard at Edith Bergler and us two
- 20: When I came home Inspee said you've lost this
- 21: But a still worse name is Schafgotsch
- 22: I am so delighted for Frau Doktor M
- 23: Because she laughed at the word Verhaltnis
- 24: Hurrah we're going to Hainfeld for Easter
- 25: This afternoon we are going to Ramsau
- 26: Though the Friday before Whitsunday was a very fine day
- 27: Verbenowitsch said Of course not
- 28: We are going to Hainfeld this summer
- 29: She didn't know marzipan before
- 30: Polten she spent all her pocket money upon flowers for him
- 31: The Vischer woman has been married in the holidays
- 32: Frau Doktor Steiner's mother is dead
- 33: Frau Doktor Malburg has fallen from grace now
- 34: Hella thinks it was the marzipan
- 35: Hella was awfully pleased with the couch
- 36: For I simply must not excite Hella
- 37: I spend most of my time with Fritzi Hubner
- 38: But really everything suits Hella
- 39: I can't go to Cilli with Hella
- 40: What you and Hella know doesn't amount to much
- 41: Hella says That is the original sin
- 42: To morrow I'm going with Father to Salzburg
- 43: Gratzl said to me You've made a conquest to day
- 44: But Hella and I wish he was not bald
- 45: He must be frightfully smitten with Dora
- 46: Walter thinks Dora awfully charming
- 47: And secondly something awful happened to Dora
- 48: Said its quite true one can always depend upon Lainer
- 49: Viktor does not walk to school with us any longer
- 50: Hella says that is nothing unusual
- 51: Dora and Mother are going to Franzensbad on June 6th
- 52: Father took Hella and me to Kahlenberg
- 53: Resi is no fit company for you
- 54: A whole day with Frau Doktor M
- 55: Hella said directly Don't mention it
- 56: Verbenowitsch was awfully puffed up because he praised her
- 57: There's no harm in going to Rodaun
- 58: To morrow we are going to Rodaun
- 59: Resi must have thought of it too
- 60: Oswald says he won't stay here
- 61: So I am writing to Ada directly
- 62: Perhaps he would never have been re ennobled
- 63: Thank goodness Ada is coming to morrow
- 64: For otherwise we should upset Ada
- 65: Hella had a splendid time in Gastein
- 66: Hella is fondest of Lajos and of Erno next
- 67: Hella is terribly afraid of him
- 68: Or Ilonka as they call her here
- 69: The Nutling is really very nice
- 70: Of course Borovsky will be expelled
- 71: If I go to supper with Hella and am just ever so little late
- 72: What I told Mother was that Frau Doktor Dunker was ill
- 73: I was awfully glad that Dora was not there
- 74: In Frau Doktor St's lesson in the First
- 75: Not a word was said about Viktor
- 76: Of course Dunker promptly called us to order
- 77: Came up and said how d'you do to Hella and her mother
- 78: Lajos is enough to give one fits
- 79: Franke has actually got Praiseworthy in Maths
- 80: Lajos gave Hella an enormous square box of sweets
- 81: Anneliese did not come until 4
- 82: Hella says too that it was not particularly entertaining
- 83: I was to have gone with Hella and her father to Maria Zell
- 84: And Dora and Aunt Dora burst out crying too
- 85: Do you spend much time with Zerkwitz
- 86: I never could have believed Anneliese would be such a sneak
- 87: In the boat we sat next Frau Doktor M
- 88: When Hella and I were standing right in front
- 89: I would not say Trottel idiot
- 90: What has become of my little Anneliese
- 91: Mother knew too that in January Hella had
- 92: And then Hella said Frau Doktor
- 93: It's a frightfully long way to Potzleinsdorf
- 94: We are staying in the Edelweiss boarding house
- 95: She says that there are absolutely no girls in Gratsch
- 96: Dora is not very much taken with the Weiners
- 97: I'm awfully sorry for the two Weiner girls
- 98: This afternoon the Weiners and we went up to Kreindl's
- 99: Anneliese wrote to me You heart of gold
- 100: And I sent a postcard to Hella
- 101: She said something about segsual intimacies
- 102: We shall still have to trust to the encyclopedia
- 103: The two Weiner girls and their Mother notwithstanding
- 104: I really don't know what time we got to Inner Lahn
- 105: But she had to come with us to take care of Marina
- 106: For when we had that trouble with Aunt Alma about Marina
- 107: The Weiners wanted to come too
- 108: But Hella could not write anything about it
- 109: Luckily we have Frau Doktor St
- 110: Prof gives frightfully long penances
- 111: And on this very matter of punctuation Frau Doktor M
- 112: And that we were not doing credit to Frau Doktor M
- 113: Hella has proved splendidly right
- 114: I can quite well fancy Frau Doktor M
- 115: And when my brother in law in spe
- 116: And Herr Milanowitz thought it most original
- 117: I see that I wrote above that the Bs
- 118: Hella consoles me as much as she can
- 119: Hella is coming to fetch me at half past 3
- 120: We don't want to disturb Frau Theyer
- 121: I am looking forward so to the tobogganing at Mariazell
